Why does it take 70 minutes to download a 13 minute movie from iTunes? This is baffling to me. Anyway, I downloaded and watched Hotel Chevalier in eager anticipation of Darjeeling Limited. I sort of wanted to squeal with delight about ‘DL’ but this short put a bit of a damper on my enthusiasm. But [...]
Based on the Mamet play Sexual Perversity in Chicago, About Last Night… is a ‘raunchy’ ‘romp’ that explores the sex lives of 4 single people in Chicago in the 80s. Demi Moore is a ‘nice girl’ who is kind of a slut and Elizabeth Perkins is a total cunt, who is also a slut. Demi [...]
Violence against women is bad. Take it from me, Jodie Foster. I’ve been beaten, raped and had jizz thrown on my face more times on film than any other woman in Hollywood. In fact, violence against women is so bad that it’s worse than murder. Watch my empowering movie and you’ll be giving a Columbian [...]
Poster Review Cool it, Wes Anderson. I already like your movies. You really don’t have to waste everyone’s time making such pretty posters. I like how the three guys each have their own thing going on (a crazy skull box, praying hands and a bandaged face, and a skeezy mustache and leis) and it somehow [...]
Soldier Released: 1998 Star: Kurt Russell Setting: Future Plot: N/A
Back when Alec Baldwin was thin and Meg Ryan had her original lips (I wouldn’t click on that link, if I were you), they co-starred in this surprising ‘body swapping’ movie called Prelude to a Kiss. It was entertaining at parts, but ultimately not very good. Basically they meet and have a whirlwind romance (you [...]
An Inconvenient Truth? More like An Inconvenient Snooze! But seriously, Global Warming Is A Serious Issue And We Should All Curb Our Carbon Emissions, Etc. This movie had a lot of really nice graphics and was very informative and educational but Al Gore’s even-keeled southern drawl put me right to sleep. Also, I wrote a [...]
This movie was in the top 5 at the box office over the past weekend. And I have never ever heard of it ever. How the fuck did that happen?
Just as I was typing the title to this post, I realized that the title was a play on CSI: Miami, my favorite CSI. I can’t believe I didn’t think of that before. Anyway. I was reluctant to see Reno 911!: Miami, actually, even though I really love the show. Mostly because the trailers and [...]
Here’s how IMDb summarizes this movie: A woman faces deadly consequences for abandoning her loving relationship with her boyfriend to pursue exciting sexual scenarios with a mysterious celebrity mountaineer. OHHHHHH. So that’s what this movie was about? In all honesty, I didn’t pay too much attention to this movie while it was on, but man [...]