02.29.08
Posted in indie, industry news, comedy, reviews at 2:52 pm by FilmFemme
Anyone who’s anyone - that is, anyone who reads Defamer - has heard about how the plot for Be Kind Rewind was (maybe) copied (probably just a coincidence) from an episode of Amanda “Ellen Page? Where the Fuck is My Oscar Nomination?!” Bynes’ old Nickelodeon show (the impeccably titled) The Amanda Show. I think this ’scandal’ is a little interesting (not as good as Katie Holmes Faked Running the NYC Marathon, but still pretty good) but since it’s probably just a coincidence, maybe it will, at the very least, serve to deflate Michel Gondry’s ego a little. No, you know, scratch that. I like to think of Michel Gondry as a kind of whimsical, artsy, aw shucks my movie isn’t that great kind of guy (don’t ask me to explain why I think this, it is probably way off base). So, maybe this accusation will devastate him completely! I definitely don’t want that.
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02.25.08
Posted in industry news at 7:22 pm by FilmFemme
Well. Mania might be a bit of a stretch. Apart from a couple of upsets - mainly in Best Actress (Marion Contillion? Coqutteien? Quotidien? You know, that French chick from that movie no one in America saw and whose title reminds me of that other French movie about that little boy who was a crossdresser? Do you know what I’m talking about? No?) and Best Supporting Actress (well, yeah, Tilda Swinton is awesome - if a little off-putting - but I really didn’t think she was going to win. I was pulling for Cate as Bob.) it was pretty tame.
How much did all those Best Songs suck? I mean, Enchanted was cute but three big song productions with no Patrick Dempsey involvement at all? No thank you!
And Diablo Cody won (Oscar party banter: “I wouldn’t pay 10 bucks for a lap dance from that chick.”)
And No Country for Old Men? Oh, I had no idea that it was even nominated for any awards because it’s not like I’ve seen 10 thousand posters with dissertations calling it The Best Reviewed Most Awesome Kickass Great High Brow Oscar Golden Globe Every Possible Award Maybe Even Webby Award Nominated Perfect Movie Ever. It was pretty great, though.
Oh well. Maybe Bjork will do something next year. We can only hope.
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02.16.08
Posted in film festivals, indie, double feature, documentary, drama at 11:36 am by FilmFemme
A Screening of 3 Short Films at the Northwest Film Forum in Seattle.
(1) Documentary about some guy who built some crazy instrument. Documentary consists of black and white digital interview that occasionally zooms in just on his eyes because that’s ‘artistic.’ Second half of documentary is silent footage of said guy while he plays his crazy instrument LIVE. Crazy instrument sounds like something Phillip Glass’ retarded child would make. Only worse.
(2) Silent Super 8 movie in which a woman hires a hitman to kill her husband’s mistress. It’s a good thing the (brilliant) director (of all 3 films) explained the plot before the screening! Thanks, guy!
(3) Silent 16mm movie in which a woman may or may not be the last person on earth. A skeleton follows her around. Then some people make out and drink martinis. Martinis are so cinematic. Also in black and white. And there is a band with a cello in it that plays LIVE.
I never thought that I would long for film school screenings. Mercifully all three films were under 10 minutes in length. After the last one, they tried to trick me into staying to watch the band jam (practice) by not having a pause. Fuck that.
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Posted in indie, romance, foreign, armchair marketing, reviews at 11:18 am by FilmFemme
Ah, subtitles. When you’re willing to read while you’re watching a movie, it must be great. Or else you were duped.
The trailer for The Band’s Visit is charming and funny. An Egyptian police band wandering a deserted street in Israel, trying to get to their gig but ending up in the wrong town! The poster is reminiscent of Wes Anderson, or something else quirky and warm with the blue uniforms standing stark against a harsh and dry background.
Yes, the marketing for this movie is pretty great, as far as these things go. Kudos, Sony Pictures Classics.
The movie itself was disappointing. Like its musicians, it meandered around slowly, directionless, relying on personality conflict instead of real humor. The band leader’s pride is funny for a little while, and his interactions with the sultry and brazen Dina are compelling. But writer/director Eran Kolirin piles quirk on quirk, like he watched Slums of Beverly Hills and then Buffalo ‘66 and then Independent Movie #846 and said to himself “Huh. I can do this. Quirk? Check! Awkward dinner table scene? Check! Ostensibly independent female character who doesn’t conform to the social mores of an economically depressed town and seeks escape through a stranger that hasn’t judged her yet? Check!”
The band finds themselves in a town where they aren’t supposed to be, but it turns out they need the town as much as it needs them.
Also, the vast majority of the film is in English, because that is the only language that both the Egyptians and the Israelis speak. However, the ENTIRE film is subtitled. In English. I found this to be very very annoying, because I find it extremely difficult to look away from English subtitles. And also because it makes no fucking sense.
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02.07.08
Posted in best of, romance, comedy, reviews at 11:05 pm by FilmFemme
So fool’s gold the thing is like a glittery rock that tricks idiots into thinking it’s actual gold. Fool’s Gold the movie has sexy fun posters, the presence of two hot and OK actors (Kate Hudson and Matthew McCona…MacConna…Mc…who gives a shit, just take off your shirt) who were pretty cute together in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days and at least one good actor (Donald Sutherland) and tricks idiots (e.g., me) into thinking it might be a cute and fun movie.
Uh.
Not so much.
Holy shit, does Fool’s Gold blow. It is, honestly, one of the most poorly written movies I have ever ever seen. The opening sequence did live up to the fun beach romp with hot bod McC. But that was because no one talked during the first 3 minutes - there was just a fun Carribean soundtrack, some mishaps, and Theo from The Cosby Show drinking a beer. Cool, right?
It was downhill and in need of a runaway truck ramp from there. The story was retarded: Some lame/unrealistic divorce scene - but oh my god they totally don’t really want to get divorced because they are totally still in love they just both have lessons to learn - and then some totally lame treasure hunting story and then everyone is on Donald Sutherland’s huge boat and Kate and Matt convince him and his Paris Hiltonesque (but brunette) daughter (it’s worth mentioning that this chick is really good at being really annoying) to go looking for some retarded treasure only once they get there, Matt McC’s mentor is already there looking for the treasure on the tip of a scary rap star (BigBunny?) that got the tip from Matt before he sunk his boat and tried to drown him. Do they find the treasure? Do they get back together? Does everyone learn important lessons about themselves and what really matters in life? For their sake, I hope so, but I wouldn’t know because I couldn’t sit through another second of that POS so you’ll have to find out on your own. Or just like, go drink a cocktail of seawater and bad shellfish because that would probably actually be more fun.
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Posted in western, action, reviews at 10:39 pm by FilmFemme
Before there was No Country for Old Men, there was All the Pretty Horses, another western-y movie based on a Cormac McCarthy novel (yeah, apparently I should have known who this dude was). Matt Damon and Elliott from E.T. live in Texas, only after Matty’s granddaddy dies, his deadbeat whore of a mom is going to sell the ranch, so he convinces Elliott to saddle up and ride their horses to Mexico where life is awesome. Along the way, they run into that kid from Sling Blade, who is completely awesome except for he’s real scared of lightning and ends up soaking wet and naked in a ditch. Then they have to steal his horse back (because it ran away while he was in the ditch), then the kid goes off by himself (aw, he was so cool!) and Matt and Elliott get a job busting broncos (this is the scene that kicks the most ass) for some Mexican Patron who has a hot daughter (Penelope Cruz). Of course, that crazy kid comes back to haunt them and then the movie takes a totally annoying turn when they end up in jail for like, 25 minutes (in the movie).
The movie wasn’t great to begin with. I got past MD’s accent, Elliott was pretty cute though he didn’t have much to do, and I could totally get behind the idea of Damon/Cruz sex. But when they went to jail it was just kind of like “WTF? Is this the same movie?” Sure, Billy Bob Thornton is no Coen brother, but, this should have been better.
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