08.26.08
Posted in action, sci fi, reviews at 9:59 am by FilmFemme
I saw this movie a while ago and I liked this movie. Yeah, no, I really did. I like Hellboy’s devil-may-care (I know, grooooaaaan) attitude. I liked Selma Blair’s nearly inexplicable righteous indignation at nonsuperhumans (not to mention her cute hair and the fact that she’s in panties for half of her screen time). I even kind of like that blue guy and how he falls in love with the creepy princess who would have been played by Samantha Morton if it was 10 years ago. I even liked the douchy, evil prince guy with the long hair whose only friend seemed to be a giant monster with detachable wrists. I really liked the giant evil plant that bled moss, that thing was aweeeessssoomee.
But you know what I don’t like? Tecate Light.*
*I haven’t tried Tecate Light. But regular Tecate makes me barf.
Permalink
08.06.08
Posted in musical, reviews at 2:34 pm by FilmFemme
Mamma Mia! is a truly awful musical recrafted for the big screen that looked like it was directed and choreographed and written by the cast of Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? Only, those kids are pretty smart, so maybe just some regular, non-TV 5th graders. Despite this fact, here are all of the people from the movie that I want to make out with & why:
- Amanda Seyfried: she plays Bill Paxton’s hot blonde daughter (one of many) on Big Love. She was in Mean Girls. She has really nice boobs that I’m jealous of.
- Stellan Skarsgård: He somehow got billed 2nd on IMDb. He was Will Hunting’s somewhat embittered but more awestruck professor/colleague. He has a circle in his name and a sexy accent.
- Colin Firth: He was Mr. Darcy in Pride & Prejudice and then Mark Darcy in the Bridget Jones movies. He’s the thinking girl’s Colin Farrell — unless you’re thinking that you don’t like the name Colin. He has a sexy accent and always looks a little bit confused about the fact that he’s in a movie.
- Pierce Brosnan: He was James Fucking Bond and now he’s in a musical. He has a sexy accent and a little bit of a paunch. I think he probably smells really good.
- Christine Baranski: She is my idol and has been since she was the drunk best friend on Cybill. I can only dream of ever having a career as the drunk best friend.
- The crazy-haired black guy that keeps trying to hook up with Christine Baranaski: He was funny and made a lot of mixed drinks with fruit spears in them.
- Meryl Streep: Oh so lovely.
- Dominic Cooper: I actually wasn’t that turned on by him. He had a nice body, but his face kind of annoyed me. Still, I’ve been known to stoop lower than an annoying face…
- ABBA in the 70s.
Permalink