In Walking Tall, The Rock kicks ass with a huge stick in order to rescue his hometown from corruption and crystal meth. And that fugly girl from Jericho shoots people while wearing just jeans and a bra. And Johnny Knoxville (I know, The Rock AND Johnny Knoxville in one movie…) I think I really missed [...]
Here’s my suggestion if you want to see We Own the Night: Pay for another movie but get there early and watch the first 90 seconds of this one. There’s a hot scene between Eva Mendes & Joaquin Phoenix. (Don’t worry, Eva Mendes doesn’t really talk during this part). Then go see some other, better [...]
Dear FilmFemme, What should I do if someone invited me to see a movie and I suggest like 3 or 4 good movies that are out that I want to see (like Eastern Promises or The Brave One or Into the Wild) and he comes back with “Let’s see Resident Evil“? Confused in California Dear [...]
Soldier Released: 1998 Star: Kurt Russell Setting: Future Plot: N/A
So, for some reason I had wanted to see this movie. So when my roommate brought it home and wanted to watch it after Heathers, I thought it could be cool and I stuck around. Let’s keep in mind that my review of Heathers was my most recent Drunk Review. Needless to say, I had [...]
Jason Bourne: Aside from these headaches, living in India with Run Lola Run is pretty sweet. I may be the only rich white dude for 100 miles but it’s not like it’s possible for any normal human to rob me. Sketchy Russians: Lets send some dude to kill Bourne, maybe he won’t be suspicious of [...]
The third installment of the Bourne trilogy, The Bourne Ultimatum is packed with a lot of ass-kicking fight sequences and some just-satisfying-enough conclusions. After three years of jetting around the world and beating lots of ass, Jason Bourne (Matt Damon) is finally getting close to figuring out who he is. Unfortunately, there’s a nosy journalist [...]
Yes, apparently you can graduate from film school without ever seeing Die Hard. However, after finally watching it, I don’t think that should be the case because it is patently awesome. I was going to skip over the plot, but then I realized there really isn’t that much plot to speak of. Basically John McClane [...]
A dozen or so shallow human characters gibber fractured dialogue at each-other amidst an incomprehensible whirling mass of metal. Watch Michael Bay’s Transformers and you’ll know what it’s like to be put in a blender with a bunch of watch parts and an iPhone playing deleted scenes from other Michael Bay films.