Nazi zombies getting killed with chainsaws? Yes, please!

Thanks, Rush Blogg!

The much delayed ensemble romantic comedy He’s Just Not That Into You, based on the book of the same name that has been dog-eared by cat-owning women across the world, is finally coming out February 6th.  The poster went online today.  Hmm…I wonder what this movie is going to be like…

Check it out, after the jump.

I don’t know, do you think maybe some attractive people are going to fall  in and out of love and learn some life lessons along the way?  I DON’T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU THINK??

I understand that they want people to get what kind of movie it is, but for all the millions of dollars spent on movie marketing they can’t get any better than a photo collage that a 5th  grader could decoupage on foamboard?  Yawn.

At least this one is a little creative:

All that being said, if He’s Just Not That Into Her, why does everyone look so damn happy?

YAWN.  There are no surprises here, it’s just a run of the mill, formulaic movie with a regimented plot structure injected with PORNO to make it seem different.

That being said, there are a lot of funny jokes.  Seth Rogen is believeable as…Seth Rogen.  Elizabeth Banks, fresh from her turn as Laura Bush in W. isn’t given too much to do except look cute and be kind of slutty (does Hollywood need another one of her?  Seriously, I can do that.  No, I DO do that, but it would be awesome to get paid for it!)  Being a longtime Kevin Smith fan, I liked seeing Jason Mewes as one of the porn stars.  He was actually kind of decent.  Jeff Anderson also managed to get work as the porn’s camera man.  No, he’s not in the porno, so you don’t have to watch him have simulated sex with anyone (thank god for small favors).   The rest of the cast is also quite funny.  Craig Robinson who is probably best known as Darryl on NBC’s The Office is always hilarious and ought to be on his way to bigger parts instead of being relegated to these scene-stealing co-star roles.  I’m not sure if he’ll be up to the challenge, but I’d be surprised if someone didn’t give him a chance.  Maybe a buddy movie with Martin Lawrence or something?  Eh, that sounds awful, actually.

The thing about movies like Zack & Miri Make a Porno that has been lamented already more times than I can count is that a fat shlub like Seth Rogen could never get a hot chick like Elizabeth Banks.  I don’t know, on a good day I’m a hot chick (no Elizabeth Banks or anything) and I would totally fuck Seth Rogen.  Even if he wasn’t famous.  I think that most guys have learned by now that the quickest way into a girl’s pants is to make her laugh, right?  If you haven’t, take note.  It is.

I liked Zack & Miri.  I won’t be rushing out to buy the DVD or anything, but I liked it.  I also appreciate that even though there are various feminist theories that hold porn and its existence as being inherently degrading and bad for women (see MacKinnon, Catharine and Dworkin, Andrea) this movie felt to me much less misogynistic than so many Hollywood films.  The women in the movie aren’t helpless (well, Miri is broke, but so is Zack), they’re sexually liberated and aren’t punished for it.  Even the bimbo porn starlet is dumb, sure, but she’s also a complete person.  Ironic, maybe, but I think Kevin Smith has admirably pro-female tendencies in his films.  I’d never thought about it before, but looking back at his filmography, I think it’s certainly true.  Hm.  I’m going to think about this further…

*Please note, a positive review of this movie is by no means an endorsement for the horrible posters, which I LOATHE.

I’m really quite excited about Milk, the upcoming Harvey Milk biopic, being a very big fan of the director Gus Van Sant and also, a very big fan of the trailer. What I really love about it, the part that makes me remember it, is the blue block letters on white backgrounds. The background is shiny and white like a fresh coat of glossy paint on cement blocks. Somehow cool to the touch and solid, but also strangely familiar and inviting. I don’t know, I think it’s really kind of beautiful though. And this movie is going to be great, I think, I hope.

(from the LATimes on 10/1/08)

Me every time I see a billboard or bus poster for Wanted:

“Is this a poster for a movie? It looks like it wants to be a movie … but clearly isn’t. Maybe it’s an urban-crime miniseries on the CW, or the very-special Smallville two-part season finale, or … a breakfast cereal?

…in a battle to see who makes me want to see this movie less.

That is an ad for the Sex and the City movie, as well as Skyy vodka. If you’re going to shoot for a new level of cross-marketing prostitution, at least choose a brand that’s not the well vodka at Hooters.

I’ll be in NYC tomorrow, paying bums to piss on these ads.

The trailer for The Band’s Visit is charming and funny. An Egyptian police band wandering a deserted street in Israel, trying to get to their gig but ending up in the wrong town! The poster is reminiscent of Wes Anderson, or something else quirky and warm with the blue uniforms standing stark against a harsh and dry background.

Yes, the marketing for this movie is pretty great, as far as these things go. Kudos, Sony Pictures Classics.

The movie itself was disappointing. Like its musicians, it meandered around slowly, directionless, relying on personality conflict instead of real humor. The band leader’s pride is funny for a little while, and his interactions with the sultry and brazen Dina are compelling. But writer/director Eran Kolirin piles quirk on quirk, like he watched Slums of Beverly Hills and then Buffalo ’66 and then Independent Movie #846 and said to himself “Huh. I can do this. Quirk? Check! Awkward dinner table scene? Check! Ostensibly independent female character who doesn’t conform to the social mores of an economically depressed town and seeks escape through a stranger that hasn’t judged her yet? Check!”

The band finds themselves in a town where they aren’t supposed to be, but it turns out they need the town as much as it needs them.

Also, the vast majority of the film is in English, because that is the only language that both the Egyptians and the Israelis speak. However, the ENTIRE film is subtitled. In English. I found this to be very very annoying, because I find it extremely difficult to look away from English subtitles. And also because it makes no fucking sense.

Is it just me, or does this poster kind of give you a headache?  It’s so busy and brash and loud and colorful but something is most definitely missing.  It doesn’t make me think whimsy and magic, it just makes me glad I don’t have a kid to drag me to see this cheesy piece of crap.

Casey Affleck… really? In a movie directed by Ben Affleck? (Notice they were smart enough to leave that off the poster…)

Isn’t this a bit like if Ron Howard cast Clint Howard as the lead in ‘A Beautiful Mind’? I mean, Clint looks more like John Nash than Russel “ya testicle!” Crowe does…

Hmm, also I think Ron Howard is probably a better director than Ben Affleck.