My blogging habits stink.  I don’t blog.  I start posts and never finish them.  I see tons of movies that never even get mentioned here.  I’m bringing shame to the domain.

So am I giving up?  Finally putting FilmFemme on the shelf?  Not yet!  Instead, I decided that starting today, February 1st, 2010, I will blog about every movie that I see this month.  At least 300 words.  It might not end up being that many movies (especially since my Netflix queue is populated with the final season of The Wire right now), but if I see a movie, it is going on this blog.  Today is also a great day to start it since I actually watched three movies   yesterday (Mr. Mom, Jennifer 8 and In the Line of Fire, since I know you were dying of curiosity), so I can slack off and not include those since they were all before midnight!  Yes!

If I actually manage to do this, I will reassess the State of the Blog.  If it goes well, I might actually get around to doing a redesign and some other boring backend stuff like I’ve been meaning to do just about forever.

Wish me luck.

I’m pretty sure that I had this terrifying but kind of bitchin’ dream because last night I watched the Dennis Quaid direct-to-DVD horror/thriller Horsemen.

Though the movie is decidedly lame with lots of stupid scenes that borrow heavily from good movies (spoiler alert, Ziyi Zhang does not make a very good Hannibal Lecter), it was notable for how horrifyingly gruesome it was.  Honestly, I can’t understand why the movie never made it to theatres because I thought people loved that shit.  I’m not usually squeamish (Hostel?  Oh please.  Ho hum) but this was seriously stomach churning.

What Horsemen does is take one somewhat obscure and really icky subculture, suspension, wrestle it from the hands of people for whom body piercing is not “extreme” enough and probably didn’t get enough attention as teenagers (including Criss Angel) and turn it into some really creepy scary gory death scenes.  Like, really gross.  Apparently nightmare-inducing gross.  Really, these scenes are the only notable thing about the movie.  The dialogue is weak, the story is predictable apart from the twist which is somewhat interesting but does not at all make up for the rest of the movie that is a gaping [edit: there is supposed to be another word here but I can't remember what it was supposed to be...I am not a very good proofreader] occasionally punctuated by vomit.

But wasn’t my dream so fucked up?!

My President

Young Jeezy feat. Nas 

Yeah Be The Realest Shit I Never Wrote
I Aint Write This Shit By The Way Nigga
Some Real Shit Right Here Nigga
This Will Be The Realest Shit You Ever Quote
Lets Go!

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Momma Aint At Home & Daddy Still In Jail
Tryna Make A Plate Anybody Seen The Scale
Lets Go!

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Money’s Light Green And My Jordans Light Grey
And They Love To See White Now How Much You Tryna Pay
Lets Go!

{Verse 1}

Today Was A Good Day Hope I Have Me A Great Night
I Dunno What You Fishin For Hope You Catch You A Great White
Me I See Great White Heavy As Killer Whales
I Cannot Believe This Who Knew It Came In Bails
Who Knew It Came With Jail Who Knew It Came With Prison
Jus Cuz You Got An Opinion Does That Make You A Politician
Bush Robbed All Of Us Would That Make Him A Criminal
& Den He Cheated In Florida Would Dat Make Him a Seminal
I Say And I Quote “We Need A Miracle”
And I Say A Miracle Cuz This Shit Is Histerical
By My Nephews And Nieces I Will Email Jesus
Tell Him Forward To Moses And CC Allah
Mr. Soul Survivor Does That Make Me A Konvict
Be All U Can Be Now Dont Dat Sound Like Some Dumb Shit
When You Die Over Crude Oil As Black As My Nigga Boo
It’s Really A Desert Storm Thats Word To My Nigga Clue
Catch Me In Las Vegas, A.R. Arizona
Rep For Them Real Niggaz Im Winnin In California
Winnin In Tennessee Hands Down Atlanta
Landslide Alabama On My Way To Sevana

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Momma Aint At Home & Daddy Still In Jail
Tryna Make A Plate Anybody Seen The Scale
Lets Go!

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Money’s Light Green And My Jordans Light Grey
And They Love To See White Now How Much You Tryna Pay

{Verse 2}

I Said I Woke Up This Morning Headache THIS BIG!
Pay All These Damn Bills Feed All These Damn Kids
Buy All These School Shoes Buy All These School Clothes
For Some Strange Reason My Son Addicted To Polos
Love Me Some Spinach Dip Im Addicted To Houston’s
And If The Numbers Is Right I Take A Trip Out To Houston
A Earthquake Out In China A Hurricane In New Orleans
Street Dreams Tour I Showed My Ass In New Orleans
Did It For Soulja Slim Brought Out B.G.
Its All Love Bun, I’m Forgiving You Pimp C
You Know How The Pimp Be
That Nigga Go’n Speak His Mind
If He Could Speak Down From Heaven
He Tell Me Stay On My Grind
Tell Him Im Doin Fine Obama For Mankind
We Ready For Damn Change So Ya’ll Let The Man Shine
Stuntin On Martin Luther Feelin Just Like A King
Guess Dis Is What He Meant When He Said Dat He Had A Dream

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Momma Aint At Home & Daddy Still In Jail
Tryna Make A Plate Anybody Seen The Scale
Lets Go!

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Money’s Light Green And My Jordans Light Grey
And They Love To See White Now How Much You Tryna Pay

{Nas}

YeaH!
History, Black History
No President Ever Did Shit For Me
Had To Hit The Streets Try To Flip Some Keys
So A Nigga Wont Go Broke
Then They Put Us In Jail Now A Nigga Cant Go Vote
So I Spend Dough All These Hoes Is Trippin
She Aint A Politician Honeys A Polotician
My President Is Black Rolls Golden Charms
22 Inch Rims Like Hulk Hogans Arms
When Thousands Of People Is Riled Up To See You
That Can Arouse Ya Ego You Got Mouths To Feed So
Gotta Stay True To Who You Are And Where You Came From
Cuz At The Top Will Be The Same Place You Hang From
No Matter How Big You Can Ever Be
For Whatever Fee Or Publicity Never Lose Your Integrity
For Years Theres Been Surprise Horses In This Stable
Just Two Albums In I’m The Realest Nigga On This Label
Mr Black President Yeah Obama Fa Real
They Gotta Put Ya Face On The $5000 Dollar Bill

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Momma Aint At Home & Daddy Still In Jail
Tryna Make A Plate Anybody Seen The Scale
Lets Go!

My President Is Black, My Lambo’s Blue
And I Be God Damn If My Rims Aint Too
My Money’s Light Green And My Jordans Light Grey
And They Love To See White Now How Much You Tryna Pay

(Outro}

So Im Sittin Here Right Now Man
(How Much You Tryna Pay)
Its June 3rd Haha 2:08 Am
Nigga I Wont Say Win, Lose Or Draw
Man We Congratulate You Already Homie
See I Motivate The Thugs Right
You Motivate Us Homie
Thats What It Is, This A Hands On Policy
Ya’ll Touchin Me Right
Yeah 1st Black President
Win, Lose Or Draw Nigga Haha
Matta Fact You Know What It Is Man
Shouts Out Jackie Robinson
Booker T Washington Homie
Oh Y’all Aint Think I Knew That Shit!
Sydney Portea What Dey Do
My President Is Black
I’m Important Too Though!
Lambos Blue
I’m Was The First Nigga To Ride Through My Hood In A Lamborghini Yeah Haha

Sen. Barack Obama accused rival Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton today of attempting to “hoodwink” and “bamboozle” voters into thinking she was the front-runner by offering him the second slot on her ticket.

from yours truly:

 Hoodwinked?

Bamboozled?

What are you trying to say?  That supporting Hilary is akin to supporting bad CGI and implications of racism?  Oh, actually, that makes sense.