As I sit down to write this, I realize a few things: it’s been a long long time since I wrote anything for this blog no one reads this blog I don’t have a job I’ve never owned a pair of cowboy boots But today of all days (Rex Manning Day? I don’t know) [...]
Last night I had this really amazingly gory gruesome dream where I had this summer job working for some rich eccentric guy. Me and like 5 of my facebook friends were all working for him, only there wasn’t really any work instead he just put together these puzzles and challenges kind of like on Survivor [...]
Let the Right One In is one of those movies that just kind of comes out of nowhere. As a matter of fact, I had heard nothing of it until I started following awards season buzz and the Internet was all atwitter. So I went in not knowing much about it except for the dreaded [...]
When I saw the trailer (btw, don’t click past the trailer on the official site, because there are spoilers galore) for The Strangers (which, if I recall correctly, was played before Baby Mama for some reason) it was seriously one of the scariest trailers I have ever seen. I was so scared, that my moviegoing companion actually said “I…I can’t [...]
Name a great Woody Allen crime/punishment/guilt/searching for God thriller: Crimes and Misdemeanors Name a Woody Allen crime/punishment/guilt/searching for God thriller that would barely be worth $6.50 somewhere in Iowa, much less $14 at the Arclight in Hollywood: Cassandra’s Dream Which is more fun to watch, Colin Farrell as the bright spot in Cassandra’s Dream or [...]
A word of advice for any dude who is thinking about watching Hard Candy, do yourself a favor and don’t eat beforehand. In Hard Candy, this photographer, Jeff (hot hot in glasses Patrick Wilson) chats up a 14 year old girl Hayley (everyone’s favorite impregnanted precocious teen, Ellen Page at her pixiest) online. They meet [...]
I Am Legend. Will Smith is ripped. Dogs are awesome. Chicks suck at surviving the apocalypse.
I can’t remember seeing a movie that elicited more nervous laughter than No Country for Old Men. I myself was completely terrified of Javier Bardem. (See my upcoming review of Mondays in the Sun if you want to know my more lurid thoughts on him). Seriously, though. I saw this about a million years ago. [...]
Derailed features the romantic pairing of quintessential hot British guy Clive Owen with quintessential cute but sexy American girl-next-door Jennifer Aniston. How could they go wrong with that? It’s bound to at least be sexy and fun to watch, right? WRONG. I only watched the first 30 minutes or so, but what I gathered was [...]
Here’s my suggestion if you want to see We Own the Night: Pay for another movie but get there early and watch the first 90 seconds of this one. There’s a hot scene between Eva Mendes & Joaquin Phoenix. (Don’t worry, Eva Mendes doesn’t really talk during this part). Then go see some other, better [...]